Tears of sorrow

  I've not posted for a long time and I've been absent from SL. I hope to change both of those things. My apologies to those who feel neglected.  I've missed my friends and exploring.
 
Don't read past the picture, if it bothers you to read things that don't pertain to SL.

  Last week, I learned of my uncle's death.  My tears started before the phone call ended. I had to know... Why was I crying for a person that was a source of frustration, pain, anguish in my life?  Oh, the stories I could tell...  But I won't dwell on those right now.  I can simply say I was curious about him at first. Eventually, over the years of exposure, my thoughts changed to disdain for this man, which turned to pity and sometimes compassion within our long time of knowing each other.  This tumultuous relationship of ours is significant to who I am today. I believe, the people who are in our lives leave marks into our soul.  The experiences both good and bad alter the thought process and reactions we have.
  After some research, I found that ... Scientists studying tears of emotion have detected a chemical that cannot be found in tears from irritants - it seems that simply by weeping we produce tiny amounts of a natural painkiller [leucine enkephalinthat hits receptors in the brain and, in turn, dulls our pain.
  So according to my brain... I did love my uncle, even if he was a bigoted, condescending, manipulative miser of a human. Our bodies have internal defenses to protect us from ourselves.  I was crying because my brain knew I needed to cry, even if I was not cognizant.

4 comments:

Pumpkin Saenz February 22, 2010 at 3:57 PM  

Glad you're back :) And that's really interesting on the tears research! I'm sorry for your loss of a family member. Even though you two weren't close, it's always...a shock...when you hear that they've passed on.

Elora Henig February 22, 2010 at 5:05 PM  

Thank you Pumpkin. :-)

Emerald Wynn March 5, 2010 at 7:13 AM  

Elora, I'm so sorry for your loss and all the confusing emotions. This was a beautiful post. You are a beautiful person. *hugs you*

Elora Henig March 6, 2010 at 12:37 AM  

Thank you Emerald. I think you are a beautiful person too. *hugs you*
It was surprising to me that writing this post helped me be strong enough to be comic relief for my Mom during the services. It was her brother and it was very difficult for her.

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Extremely shy in large social settings but love to make friends, to explore and go on adventures, wicked sense of humor (once I feel comfortable), and a bit of a social-chameleon (so I've been told)